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To: BogGoblin.co.uk

From: Mzebonga

RE: Our tempestuous and burgeoning relationship

It's been a while, in a non-Staind type way. You and I don't talk like we used to and there are a number of reasons why this has happened.

How do I tell you that sometimes, people just grow apart? You're young and you've barely had a chance to prove yourself on this global stage known as the Internet. How soul destroying could be for an infant to be told that he/she has come to the end of their road before they even get a chance to bask in the glory of the sun?

This is all very melodramatic and all but, honestly, you're not going anywhere. You know I love you don't you, baby? You complete me.

But there comes a time when any relationship needs to move from fooling around on the sofa when the parents are out to moving in together, marriage and a family of our own. Are you able to have my babies?

The truth is that I neglect you and take you for granted. When was the last time we spent some quality time together? I've got my studies and my work but what have you got to fill the long, lonely days? George? Festus? I wouldn't say JCP, she has her own site to support and you're nothing more than a cheap fuck to her.

So, here's what I propose. We have a "Date Night" and I spent some helping you through the difficult times and putting our relationship back on track.

You and I can do great things, BogGoblin.co.uk (at least within the realms of my own bottomless ego) and I'm committed to being all that we can be if you're willing to come with me?

What say you?